Starting your journey as a new manager can feel like stepping into a whirlwind of responsibilities, expectations, and challenges. One of the most crucial skills you’ll need is the ability to coach your team effectively. Enter The Coaching Habit by Michael Bungay Stanier—a book that cuts through the noise and delivers practical, actionable advice that every new manager should embrace. This book doesn’t just belong on a list of leadership books for new managers—it should be at the top.
1. The Power of Coaching Over Directing
Imagine being a manager who doesn’t just tell people what to do but helps them discover the solutions themselves. That’s the power of coaching. Michael Bungay Stanier argues that coaching is more effective than directing, especially in a leadership role. Why? Because when you coach, you empower your team members to think independently and develop their problem-solving skills. This, in turn, builds a more resilient and self-sufficient team.
Stanier writes, “Even if you have a bad habit of jumping in and telling people what to do, it’s possible to change.” This quote encapsulates the essence of The Coaching Habit. The book is about transforming your approach from a directive to a coaching style, which can revolutionize the way you lead. For new managers, this shift is particularly important. It can be tempting to try and prove yourself by having all the answers. But Stanier shows that asking the right questions is far more powerful.
2. The Seven Essential Questions
At the heart of The Coaching Habit are seven essential questions that Stanier presents as tools for effective coaching. These questions are designed to spark meaningful conversations, encourage deeper thinking, and help your team members arrive at their own solutions. Let’s take a closer look at these questions and why they are so impactful.
The first question is, “What’s on your mind?” It’s a simple yet profound opener that allows the other person to set the agenda. This question is effective because it immediately engages your team member in a dialogue about what matters most to them, rather than what you think is important. By starting with this question, you create space for honest, open communication.
Another key question is, “And what else?” Stanier calls this the AWE question, and for good reason. It encourages your team member to dig deeper and explore other aspects of the issue at hand. This question prevents the conversation from ending prematurely and often leads to unexpected insights. Stanier notes that this question alone can often double the productivity of a conversation.
One more question worth highlighting is, “What’s the real challenge here for you?” This question shifts the focus from general problems to specific challenges, making it easier to identify actionable steps. It’s a question that cuts through the noise and gets to the heart of the matter.
Each of these seven questions is designed to build a habit of inquiry rather than advocacy. For new managers, mastering these questions can dramatically improve your coaching effectiveness and, by extension, your leadership capabilities.
3. The Neuroscience of Habits: Why Small Changes Matter
One of the reasons The Coaching Habit is so effective is because it’s grounded in the science of habits. Stanier explains that coaching isn’t about making dramatic changes overnight but rather about building new habits—one small step at a time. This approach is particularly reassuring for new managers, who may feel overwhelmed by the prospect of overhauling their leadership style.
Stanier cites research on habit formation to underscore his point. He notes that it takes an average of 66 days to form a new habit, which is why the book focuses on making small, consistent changes. He writes, “If you can get your new habit to the point where it’s mostly automatic, you’ve unlocked the potential for lasting change.” This scientific grounding makes the book not just inspirational but also practical.
For a new manager, this means that you don’t have to become a master coach overnight. Instead, you can start by incorporating one of the seven questions into your daily interactions and gradually build from there. The idea is to make coaching a natural part of your leadership style, not an added burden.
4. The Importance of Silence and Listening
In a world where everyone seems to be talking, Stanier highlights the underrated power of silence and listening. He points out that great coaching isn’t just about asking the right questions—it’s also about giving the other person space to think, reflect, and respond. This is especially important for new managers, who may feel pressured to fill every silence with advice or instructions.
Stanier emphasizes that silence is where the magic happens. He writes, “Silence isn’t just an absence of sound; it’s a space where things can emerge.” By embracing silence, you allow your team members to process their thoughts and come up with their own solutions. This not only empowers them but also reinforces their confidence in their abilities.
Listening, too, is a critical skill that Stanier advocates for in The Coaching Habit. He stresses that listening is not just about hearing words; it’s about understanding the underlying emotions, concerns, and motivations. For new managers, developing strong listening skills can be a game-changer. It shows your team that you value their input and are genuinely interested in their perspective.
5. The Real-World Impact of Coaching
So, what happens when you apply the principles of The Coaching Habit in the real world? Stanier shares numerous examples and case studies that illustrate the transformative power of coaching. These stories serve as both inspiration and proof that the coaching approach works.
For instance, one manager who adopted Stanier’s methods reported a significant increase in team engagement and productivity. By asking the right questions and giving his team the space to think independently, he was able to foster a more collaborative and motivated work environment. This isn’t just theory; it’s a practical, real-world application of the concepts in the book.
Moreover, research backs up the effectiveness of a coaching leadership style. According to a study by the International Coach Federation, companies that have a strong coaching culture report higher employee engagement, better performance, and greater job satisfaction. This aligns perfectly with the outcomes that Stanier describes in The Coaching Habit.
For new managers, this is incredibly encouraging. It shows that by adopting a coaching approach, you can have a positive, measurable impact on your team and your organization as a whole.
Conclusion
In a world full of leadership books, The Coaching Habit by Michael Bungay Stanier stands out as an indispensable guide for new managers. Its emphasis on asking the right questions, building small habits, and embracing silence and listening offers a refreshing, practical approach to leadership. As you embark on your journey as a new manager, consider how adopting a coaching style could transform your team and your leadership success.
Are you ready to make coaching a habit in your leadership style?
